Friday, January 22, 2010

Abitino Pizzeria: "Everything in this place looks synthetic."


After our experience at Gino's our bullshit detectors were pretty perfectly aligned with our chakras and there was no way we were falling for any fakers. And Abitino Pizzeria seems like a realm of false authenticity. The inside is decorated with fake brick and everything is too big and clean. The place looks really synthetic, and it's no surprise, because according to the website they're a small local chain. I'll find out as I get further downtown, but I bet all the Abitino's locations look the same.


The pizza? Not so great. The whole slice is way too orange, which tells me they are using cheap cheese. And it tastes crappy too. The sauce is totally unexceptional. The crust/dough, however, is stellar, which makes it even more of a shame that the cheese sucks and the sauce is a bore.

The pizzamen here, though, are genuine mooks and totally gregarious and loud. We couldn't find any oregano, so Phoebe very politely asked a guy walking by if he knew where we could locate some. He turned toward the kitchen and shouted, "Vinny where's the oregano? This lady wants oregano."
Vinny shouted back, "Someone five-fingered the oregano again."
"SOMEBODY FIVE-FINGERED THE OREGANO AGAIN, VINNY?!"
"Yeah, someone five-fingered the oregano again."
Then our dude turned to Phoebe, "Sorry lady, someone five-fingered the oregano."
And Phoebe turned to me, "I don't know if you heard the news yet, Colin, but..."
I felt like I was in the 3 Stooges, it ruled.


Abitino's - $2.75
1592 1st Ave
New York, NY 10028

----------

As the month comes to a close, I'd like to remind anyone who hasn't ever donated or hasn't donated in a while that it certainly wouldn't hurt. Top right corner of the page. And if you donate I'll send you a zine gratis. (Don't worry prior donaters, you'll all get zines in the mail, too.) While we're talking internet 2.0 stuff, don't forget to join the Slice Harvester Facebook Page which I'm honestly unsure of the purpose of, but it totally makes me feel awesome whenever it gets more "fans." Also, subscribe to the Twitter Feed to get Twitter-exclusive updates about things like where to get a good Tamale and what public restroom I'm currently using.

And speaking of the zine, it's all done and I'm just working out some kinks in printing the cover, but I'll be having a Zine Release Party on Friday February 12th from 8-10pm at Book Thug Nation, the best used bookstore in New York City. The zine will not be available before then, but after that I'll put up a paypal link as well as a list of stores where it can be purchased. It looks beautiful, thanks to the incredible Joe Porter who illustrated it magnificently. Here is a sample page:

Oh, and since I've managed to forget to do this for the past few days, thanks to Put This On for the big up the other day when they linked the photo of my grandfather. PTO is one of two blogs that I actually read, the other being Bike Snob. In fact, let this be the beginning of what will probably be many months of public entreaties to get the Bike Snob to ride around and eat pizza with me. Aside from writing one of the two blogs I actually read, he is also one of the two people I started Slice Harvester partially as an excuse to fabricate a means to hang out with. Woah, that last sentence, it's terrible. The other person is Tom Scharpling from the Best Show, but I am pretty sure he is a vegan.

No comments:

Post a Comment