Friday, February 12, 2010

Manhattan Brick Oven Pizza & Grill: "This pizza is making me stupid."

Manhattan Brick Oven Pizza & Grill
, or Manbrivenpig as it's known among the community of mediocre pizza fans, is the dullest most boring place ever. For all the shit I talked about the Upper West Side, it is like the Castro compared to the barren, cultural wasteland around Hunter College.

The slice here was certainly noticeably better than the last two, but that's not really saying much. Permit me to go on a little tirade here, okay? When I see a sign that says "Brick Oven Pizza" I expect Neapolitan style, super thin crust, gourmet fancy shit. Which, as I may or may not have said, is totally fine by me, even really awesome. Like, if I am out at some shmancy eatery enjoying civilized society and before I get my awesome fucking bowl of garlicky mussels everyone at the table splits a little, crispy, delicious pizza, that is probably rad. However, this here internet site is called Slice Harvester, by God, not Pie Harvester. I am here to give you the rundown on what is going on in the world of the On-The-Go Street Slice. Which is only to say, whatever my feelings are about Neapolitan/Brick Oven pizza, it generally falls outside the realm of my expertise. But that doesn't mean I don't know what it fucking looks like! Do you think I'm some Midwestern Barbarian*? Now, considering the image that most people associate with "Brick Oven Pizza", this slice was a bunch of bullshit. It was just a way less substantial, totally mediocre NY Street Slice. And now, I was admittedly still drunk when I was in this place, but if I remember correctly, they didn't even have a brick oven! They just had a regular pizza oven with a brick wall right next to it to look like the side of the damn thing. I'm probably wrong about that, but if not it is some incredibly sheisty shit.

Manhattan Brick Oven Pizza & Grill - $2.50
300 East 72nd Street
New York, NY 10021

*This is not to say that Nato knows nothing of pizza, it's just that as I typed the phrase "Midwestern Barbarian" a clear image of his grinning mug came to mind and I JUST COULDN'T RESIST. Really some Minneapolis crustlord tribal-chinbeard End Times Oogle would probably have been more appropriate but what-ever.


  1. the hunter college area is a cultural wasteland... ues prudes & spolied brats mostly, but im willing to say it's the fault of marymount... and by god, absolutely, this place's pizza is the pits. went in once in the 6 years i went to hunter.

  2. Hi,
    I've read the last two pages of this blog, and I must say I laughed like an idiot xD
    btw I'm italian, and I think it's soooo funny seeing how people use Italian words! for example: "Abitino" means "little, cute dress", and I can't find any reason to call a pizzeria with that name... and I can swear that nobody in Italy has a surname that is similar to "abitino" xD
    btw, keep on with the hard work! :DD
    I hope everything I wrote make sense, I'm not that skilled at English :P

    ps. I didn't know if I you hate comments or what, but a comment can't hurt anybody, uhu? (: