Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Pizza Place: "NoooOOoOoOOOooOOOOOOOoOOooooOOooooOOoo!!!!!!"

The font on the awning of Pizza Place reminds me of the kind of old sci-fi and pulp paperbacks my friend Cullen reads or Mike Hunchback posts on the Freedom School Records blog. It makes me think of digging through crates of books on the street, in used bookstores or in my parents basement looking for anything with a cool cover. It makes me think of reading my first Sam Delany and P.K. Dick novels, which were totally galvanizing moments in my life.

Sadly the pizza here doesn't remind me of anything good at all. Me and John each took a bite and looked at each other and gave eyes that were like, "eh, it ain't so bad and it's cheap to boot!" And then we both swallowed our respective bites and were both hit with the aftertaste and all of a sudden it was like that homophobic scene in Ace Ventura Pet Detective when he's scratching at his tongue and crying in the shower because he kissed a dude. We each tried a bite of the crust which was subpar and then John just took the slice and threw it out into traffic. It slapped on to the front of a cop car and I said, "FUCK YOU, PIG!" and we put on our rollerblades and took off! There were some crusties busking the Benny Hill Theme song on Astor Place and we had a really cool chase in circles around the cube where first the cop chased us and then we chased the cop and then John was wearing the cop's hat and the cop was wearing John's jacket and then we were sitting on top of the cube and the cop was just scratching his head and then we were alyl mysteriously running around in heart-print boxers until we finally ran East to Tompkins Square Park where we posed as picnicing yuppies and the cops lost us.


Pizza Place - $1.50
226 E 14th (2nd & 3rd)
New York, NY 10003


  1. Really enjoy your blog.

    It seems like most pizza places you've been to have a sub-mediocre slice - have tried many so I can believe you. What do you think that says about the state of pizza in NYC?

  2. This right here is a quality review.

  3. This may be the best blog post I've ever read.