Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Koronet Pizza: "You probably already know everything I'm about to write here."

After Giovanni's, Gabby and I finally ditched those squares from the Daily News (jk u guyz r kewl!! lol) and struck out on our own, like a couple of rascally vagabonds. I guess the simile is pretty unnecessary because at various points on and off in both of our lives, both Gabby and me have been rascally vagabonds. And you know what Hegel said in his essay about Kerouac, Of Lordship and Vagabondage, "Once a bum always a bum (no hobo)."

I digress, after freeing myself from the demanding shackles of low-pressure, high publicity media attention, Gabby and I strolled over to Koronet.

I'm gonna keep this entry brief, because there has been plenty of writing about Koronet done. They are notable because their slices are enormous, like, the size of two normal slices, but cost less than the price of two normal slices. The current price seems to be holding at $3.50.

This slice is all about big appetites. The size forces it to go into a Dough-Thickness Bracket higher than I generally prefer, for the sake of maintaining structural integrity. Aside from that, the dough is good quality, the cheese is good, ample but not overabundant, and the sauce, although on the sweetish side, is not so bad. Overall the slice is on the above-average side of plain old "good," but the amount of food you get for your money makes it kind of a spectacular bargain. However, I can't help but imagine that if this were a regular slice, at a regular price, it wouldn't be such a great deal, but it might be close to perfect, assuming the dough thinned out equally to the decrease in overall weight for it to hold.

In a world without money, where I can have whatever I want whenever I want (so, more accurately, in a world with money where I am extravagantly wealthy), I would never eat here, because I would fly my rocketbike to DiFara's every time I wanted a slice. But since I am constrained by my limited finances, Koronet is always a pleasure to stop at when I find myself in Morningside Heights because unlike most shticky pizza that prides itself on size, Koronet is actually good quality.

Koronet Pizza
2848 Broadway
New York, NY 10025


I was on the radio this morning on WOR 710 AM on the John Gambling Show. It is a short interview and I kind of sound like a dick, but it was first thing in the morning for me, so cut me some slack, huh?
WOR Interview (John Gambling Show) by sliceharvester


  1. The one thing that has to be mentioned is that it's right near Columbia, which means most of their customers are college students. And a 'net (as we called them in my day) is the most perfect food in the world for a college kid: cheap, delicious, and goes perfectly with all forms of chemical enhancement.

    If I had limitless funds and rocketbike fuel, I'd be at DiFara for every slice, too. But if it was one of the 5 or so days a week when DiFara is closed, I'd be at Koronet's.

  2. I'm curious to know what you make of the joint on the Northeast corner of Amsterdam at the corner of 106th. Five or so years ago, it was fucking fantastic. It's changed hands once or a few times since, so now it's anyone's guess.

    From the place pizza goes to die,


  3. Uh, that's the northeast corner of Amsterdam and 106th. What the fuck is wrong with me?

  4. Just heard about your project and listened to your interview. Awesome.

  5. Nate! If you find yourself in S.F., the pizza place on 21st between Mission and Valencia (closer to Valencia) is pretty good. Also the Indian Pizza place up the street from Thrillhouse is the best notapizza you'll ever have in your life.

  6. while the ratio of crust to cheese is the same on a large slice as compared to a small slice, the ratio of crust to cheese is lower on a large slice than on two small slices of the same total surface area. this is why i like koronet. better crust/cheese ratio (i.e. more surface area per inch of crust) per unit of pizza eaten.