Friday, March 11, 2011


So, recently my friend Scotty came to visit. Him and me and Cory and Johnny, both of whom you should know if you've been reading Slice Harvester, used to play in a band together some time ago. It was a fun band, even though I accidentally read in Cory's diary once that he hated being in a band with me. Oh, and we also used to be roommates, back when my apartment had no doors and there were only sheets hanging in the doorways. For a while he was into squatting on top of the toilet seat whenever he took a dump because "that's how the cavemen did it," which presumably referred to the squatting posture and not to perching atop a toilet, because cavemen didn't have toilets. We were not really in the habit of having any privacy when we lived together and once I came home with some company and, it bears noting here that the bathroom is directly across from the front door, I opened up the door and there was Scotty wearing a striped polo shirt, no pants and a pair of running shoes, squatting on the pot just letting it all slide out like The Great Pizzaola intended. Hopefully he doesn't mind that I just shared that story!

Anyway, it was really good to see him and I made plans to try my damnedest to get him out eating pizza with me, which happened, luckily. We stopped briefly at Economy Candy and I bought my special ladyfriend some candy cigarettes. And then we went to Rosario's, which I was excited about because I've always liked that place.

This place is great! They have all these weird pictures on the walls, and the pizza man was so nice and they had classic rock radio playing, which is totally not ideal, but there's something about a pizzeria with classic rock on the radio. And there's a lot of windows and it's nice and sunny and I was there with my friend Scotty and it was a nice day and the sun was out and I was in a really good mood and everything seemed to be alright in the world.

This slice looks a lot more orange than it actually did in real life. I am sure there is some color correcting I could do if I were so inclined, or had any knack for that sort of thing. But anyway! Rosario's! Always a quality slice. Such a pleasure to eat here. My notes say, "delicious!" three times and "great quality ingredients!" twice, because I kept writing the same things over and over because I was so enraptured by this pizza and by the great company I had. This slice has perfect cheese elasticity, hearty crunch, and a kindly, gentle sauce. Perfect ratios mean these ingredients work in the most harmonious symbiosis, creating a heroic explosion of flavors all up in your mouthpiece. Kudos to you, Rosario's! You are the best slice in your neighborhood, by a longshot!


Rosario's - $2.50
173 Orchard St (at Stanton)
New York, NY 10002


  1. great place to watch a yanks game, too!! <3 rosario's

  2. Are you crazy man?

    I agree with almost all of your reviews, but Rosario's??

    It's average NYC pizza at best and gross at worst

  3. thank god. all my favorite places you hate and i was beginning to think you know nothing about pizza (maybe you don't). but at least we can agree on rosarios.

  4. No F%ucking way! haha

    Seriously, Rosario's is your typical corner pizza place in NYC.

    It's a 3/8 on a good day

  5. Anons #2 & #4:

    I don't know which New York City you live in, but the one where I live and have eaten 100s of different slices of pizza in does not have pizza of this caliber on every corner. If that was the case, I would consider it a miracle.

    "Miracles are the way things ought to be," right? Like Cyrus said. So maybe you guys are just wishful thinking.

  6. Also, please see my new "About the Rating System!" page:

  7. As the Romans used to say, "De gustibus non disputandum est" which, loosely translated, means, "Sliceharvester has this one absolutely right and Anons #2 and #4 are smoking crack".

    OK, it doesn't mean that really, but Rosario's is awesome and Sal is a national treasure.