Monday, May 16, 2011

Luna Pizza: "Worst NYC Disasters by Century: 1668 - First Yellow Fever Outbreak; 1776 - Approx. 1/4 of City Burned to Ground; 1832 - Cholera Pandemic; 1977 - Blackout and Ensuing Riots; 2011 - This Slice of Pizza."

. Make sure and get your hazmat suit on before coming to Luna Pizza, because this slice is a mess! The place itself is charming and I REALLY wanted to like it. It's got a real family vibe, not that it's like A Family Restaurant (which I guess it kind of seems to be), but like it's run by people who are related to each other. I got the distinct impression that the guy who sold me my slice was the lady who rang me up's nephew. But the slice! The slice should be declared a superfund site.

This slice was forged in the molten center of the Earth! It looks like that one Dick Tracy villain with the melty face. Or like a Charles Burns drawing. And when I picked it up it totally fell apart!

Check out the aftermath of that precarious lift:

A slice of pizza should not do that! Greg said "tastes exactly like the Pizza In A Cup I used to make at the Pickle Barrel," a grease pit Greg used to cook at in Chattanooga, TN. I feel like they should've just put the sauce and cheese into a bowl and like, given me a piece of toast to dip into it. That would've been more functional and it would've had the same effect. The grease to cheese ratio on this slice was an exact 1:1 when it should be like, 1:50. And the sauce tasted like it would've been better suited for a seafood pasta dish, which wasn't necessarily the worst thing, but with all the other distressing elements just contributed to the ultimate sense of disappointment we all felt about this slice. The crust was fucking awesome, though.


This slice coulda been like a 6 if I had been able to lift it up. Step your game up Luna!

Luna Pizza - $2.50
225 Park Row (at Worth)
New York, NY 10038


  1. Sorry to date myself and you, but there weren't any riots during the blackout in the 60s.

    You are thinking of the blackout in 77, the Summer of Sam, and Reggie and the Yankees.

  2. Ron, I'm the one that should be sorry, I KNOW that. I feel kind of embarrassed actually.

  3. Wow, what a spaz. You usually need two hands to lift a hot slice of pizza. Next time wait for the slice to get ice cold and then you might be able to lift it with one hand. Or, stick to Dominoes. At least their slices are small enough to handle with one hand. SPAZ!