Friday, October 1, 2010

Bravo Pizza: "Looks like an open wound."

Bravo Pizza. I have been to a few Bravo Pizza locations so far, and I have always been disappointed in their pizza but charmed with the cramped, neon-lit interiors of their restaurants. This place threw me a curveball in that the pizza sucked, and I hated being in there. The dude and the lady were really concerned with the Giants game on the television, which is totally fine, but homeboy put my slice in and then just forgot about it. But we will get to the horrid pizza in a minute.

This particular Bravo location, unlike the others, is spacious. In fact, I would say it is too spacious. There are some mirrors, and a couple rows of neon around, but it's not the same cramped, claustrophobic, mirrored box that I love the others for being. This place has a hideously bland interior, topped off by a really ornate ancient ceiling that makes me feel like I am eating pizza on an airship, which certainly is pretty cool, although I bet the guy that gives you the airship in Final Fantasy III (Cid? I don't remember, it was long ago), would never burn my pizza.

Okay, this pizza sucked, and the guy who sold it to me obviously didn't care about me as a customer even a little. Even if this slice wasn't burnt, it still would've been utter shit. First, it was too orange. Second, there was too much sauce and the sauce was WRETCHED. Third, it was burnt to a crisp. Fourth, there was a giant TV like, 5 inches from my face playing the most awful commercials. All told, this slice might've been rated a little better if they hadn't fucking forgot about me, but the Slice Harvester is vindictive and don't you forget it.


Bravo Pizza - $2.50
64 7th Ave (at 14th)
New York, NY 10011

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